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Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Kangana Ranaut turned 32 (?) years old on March 23 2019. Here’s wishing her a lifetime of happiness and more success. Also, here’s hoping that she concentrates on her work more than what’s happening around her. She went on a silent meditation trip before her birthday, so here’s hoping.

    Happy Birthday, Kangana! Saw you first in ‘Gangster’ and we thought you were related to Mandakini.

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Yeah, we don’t really see it now. But back then, Kangu was new with a fresh face.

    So, a reader kindly and angrily commented yesterday how none of Bollywood’s top people wished Kangana Ranaut for her birthday and we thought why not we make them to do it. But, not all of them…Just the ones that Kangu publicly blasted.

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    So, let’s go…

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Karan Johar

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Happy Birthday, Kangu. As you may know my Twitter was hacked yesterday, so I didn’t have access to it to wish you publicly. I would have messaged you, but my phone dropped in the toilet when I saw this while in the bathroom:

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut

    Do you know how difficult it was for me to use a normal landline and call up Gauri behen so that she can ask Shah Rukh bhai to stop these snake attacks on me? GUTS, I tell you…

    Mistakes can happen…It happened when I called you on Koffee with Karan and you made nepotism a thing. Now because of you I have all these star kids sitting on my shoulders waiting to be launched since you called me nepotism ka baap.

    I have to go, I need to script the next episode of Aloo and Sherbet. Yes, this is my life now. Toddles…

    P.S. I didn’t watch Manikarnika because Jhansi Ki Rani is not my chachi!

     

    Hrithik Roshan

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Happy Birthday, person-I-don’t-know (even though we worked together in 2 films). You are the reason Krrish 2 was amazing. You are also the reason why I had to delete my email account. I would have sent you an email, but I don’t want my spam to be spammed in return. Now, let me go back to pretending I don’t know you.

     

    Alia Bhatt

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Happy Birthday, Kangana. Daddy told me not to contact you anymore after you outed me last time. I really wanted you to come and watch Raazi so that you know what great acting means. Also, I am going to win all the best actress awards this year. Yes, I know. My father is going to MAKE them give it to me. Next year too, it will be mine.

    P.S. I didn’t watch Manikarnika because she is not my daddy’s chachi. If she is not his chachi then she is not related to me so why should I watch it! As you know, we only support our own. Dharma and Nepotism Zindabad.

     

    Deepika Padukone & Ranveer Singh

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Deepu: Asks, “Do I have to wish her? She didn’t sign Shabana Azmi’s Deepika Bachao’s letter, so why should I wish her? ”

    Ranveer: Well, you did wish Katrina for her birthday, didn’t you?

    Deepu: That’s different. Chalo, you wish her on behalf of both of us.

    Ranveer: (Puts on colorful sofa clothing and 70s-style sunglasses, proceeds to switch on phone’s camera) Happy Birthday, Kangana. From me and my wife. Muah…When is the party? Call me and I will come shake a leg with you till morning!

    Deepu: Why are you asking her to invite you to her party? Did you forget we didn’t invite her to the wedding?

    Ranveer: Oh Sh!t…I have been jumping on people and hitting the ground so hard that I might have gotten ghajini a bit. Never mind. Who cares? Gully Boy is a hit! (Starts singing “Mere Gully Mein, Mere Mere Gully Mein”)

     

    Aamir Khan

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Oh teriii…It’s her birthday? Oh really?!

     

    Ranbir Kapoor

    Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!

    Happy Birthday, Kangana. Wishing you many happy returns of the day. Lots of love.

    By the way, why did you have to go and talk about my comments from an interview last year? Do you know how much work I had to put in to make people forget about my insensitive comments? Yes, I am rich I don’t know what it’s like to be middle class or low class. So what? That doesn’t mean because of your stupid comments I have to be sent out on babysitting duties?! Man, this is f@#k!^g stupid. Do you know who I am? And now, my house hasn’t had water in days. That’s why I cannot shower. I have to go to the Hilton’s to shower! This is how rich I am.

     

    That’s about it. Did we leave anyone out?

    P.S. This is for fun only. Don’t take it too seriously.

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    17 thoughts on “Happy Birthday, Kangana Ranaut!”

    1. Saw Manikarnika and loved it. Kangana was awesome. And I say that with all seriousness. Can we please acknowledge good actors in Bollywood? Especially since we are being choked with useless, talentless star kids.

      Happy birthday Kangana. May you succeed despite the ill wishes and caricatures of you.

    2. I greatly respect Kangana as an actor and think she has superb potential as a director too. But frankly at the moment, I’d be scared to wish her even if I’d done absolutely nothing to harm her. Who knows, she’d probably rant in the next 5 interviews about how I wished her happy birthday but never turned up to her screening, how Bollywood is empty words, spineless etc etc. Den Rangoli wud txt ncmprhnsbl wallz of words lyk dis n every1 wud feel hrrbl n far frm coky. 👀

      1. Lmao 😂 it’s a 50/50 risk. She can praise or drag depending on if she felt the genuine

        Rangoli drags everyone. She dragged Filmfare two days ago. The more the fanbase cries out and tell her to the stop, the harder she goes. So… it’s better to be mute 🤐

    3. Hilarious! Thanks for this post.
      As my birthday wish for Kangana, I hope she starts reading up on current affairs more carefully. For an intelligent person like her she sure is ignorant about the country’s political affairs.

      Agree with a previous comment that Alia was very mature about her response to Kangana’s attacks!

    4. Kangana is just a pathetic human being. She is the biggest 🐍 in case you haven’t seen it yet. Ask Apurva Asrani, Harshad Mehta or Krish. They’ll tell you if you don’t believe me.

    5. Hahahaha…this is some hilarious stuff especially the KJo part. Anyway, happy birthday to Kangana. For all her crazy, she still remains an awesome performer and I do somehow love her voice. Its very innocent and childlike at times.

      Admin – the Filmare awards was filled with all sorts of fakeness. Please do a write-up on that. We could all do with some laughs.

    6. Dear, osop .. Thanks for confirming my doubts that you are totally biased towards kangana ranaut and are hell bent on sticking out to that negative ball of energy I don’t know for what.. And kindly leave alia out of it
      She took all of the negative bull thrown at her by your favourite and answered like how it is supposed to . It’s her class vs your favs.. You lost a reader permanently today . Thank you very much.

      1. Take it easy yo! Admin shades everyone. Besides, Alia has her pappa to take vengeance on Kangana while she utters sweet words.

      2. Alia’s “CLASSY” reply to Kangana… isn’t that how her PR pushed it in the media? What is so classy about constantly quoting her dad? It only demonstrates she is too much of an idiot to have a mind of her own. Being a rehearsed puppet is not classy.

    7. Reading this made me laugh after a long time. I had a pretty rough week. Have been feeling low for so long but reading this article made me laugh so much. Especially Karan’s part.

    8. Omg hahahs so funny and thank u for noticing my comment about her bday. Fan for ever now mwah

    9. 😂😂😂

      Poor Kjo. He got dragged so hard for that tweet. I think he did it for attention. Crazy sob.

      Is Hrithik back with Suz?

      Filmfare was an orgy. Do a post on all the pictures including Kats wtf face.

      Kangana is getting a butt load of money for the Jayalalathi Biopic and she is cocky enough to say she deserves the NA for Manikarnika & she doubts any performanve this year will beat hers but she will see. He he Stan doesnt like her lack of humility 😂.

      All in all Kangana had an amazing birthday away from her crazy bean sister Rangoli, the cute brother was there though. She had cake, flowers, a few friends, her favourite media persons/papz & she announced her biggest most challenging movie till date. Awesome.

      1. Second this thought Kala. May she have a fun birthday with those who respect, appreciate and genuinely care for her, and may that tribe increase.

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