Today’s first blind item comes from Hindustan Times in Malavika Sangghvi’s collumn. First of all, what an illustration of this actress! Maybe the writer sees her this way, but it’s funny and strange at the same time. Speaking of which, did you see how Kim Kardashian looks now? Like a cyborg or a female robot. It’s like she went under the knife and had the surgeons suck all the fat out of her. It’s scary and probably, she doesn’t realise how dangerous these procedures are. But yes, she looks like that caricature below in the blind item.

So back to this blind item, it seems even the media is not buying this engagement either. Now that he is in India with his parents to officially meet her family, people are really perplexed because before this, everyone assumed it was a PR-fabricated relationship but now all of this is a little confusing. It seems that they are hell-bent on proving to the media and fans that they are indeed together. Let’s wait and see what she has planned for us this weekend. The media is saying it’s an engagement party while some of her close friends say they didn’t get an invitation. Others are saying they are getting married. Let’s just wait and see. In the meantime, enjoy this blind item below from HT.

 

 

Bollywood Blind Item

 

True Lies

“I saw it! You saw it? She was flashing it when she waved ya. It was huge. Def an engagement ring! See her older pictures na? There was not that ring. I recognised it when she came out of the car. She was trying to make it catch the photographer’s flash. Like this, she did.”

“No ya, why would she do that? She doesn’t want anyone to know. She took it off at the airport. It’s on YouTube, Google it. She was trying to hide it from puppy-ratsies.”

“No ya, she DOES want people to know! She’s trying to make, you know who, ‘J’. She’s hoping this will shake him up, like proving her point. Giving him an ulti-mating.”

“Arrey ya, she’s forgotten him completely! She’s very happy with this one. She told my sister’s bua’s neighbour’s cousin sister, who sometimes goes to do her waxing and all, that she was very happy. Only some date issue for him still.”

“Too much excitement then! You know that filum writer for some net magazine, I was telling you about? She was telling someone in the compartment today that ‘bahut tension hai aaj kal, sab star wedding dates ka.’ Meaning, too many weddings these days, Dips and Rans too na? They have to work overtime. Some get to go to Italy too! Means, public wants to know, no? To the last second they want to know. Everything!”

“That way our Neha girl was clever. She toh made overnight wedding! And, still got viral pictures and all. Same thing these days. Why to make big-big wedding and spend so much money and fly? These people are cleverer. They will make abroad plans. They only will enjoy! And they will send the pictures all over.”

“I think that’s why she’s doing it. She wants to make viral picture of her wedding and make it go bigger than Deepika’s, no? It’s all competition. So she is getting married quickly before. Simply.”

“Ya simply. She’s going to make a wedding. To break the nets.”

 

OSOP Guesses

She: Priyanka Chopra

Him: Shah Rukh Khan

Dips: Deepika Padukone

Rans: Ranveer Singh

Neha: Neha Dhupia